SPEAK LESS, LISTEN MORE
Somehow, pictures of nature or, all the nature shots that I take always seem to calm me, I really relax a little when I look at them! Anyhoo…
Hello everyone! 🙂
I trust you are all well. A little reflective post, as you know this is what I do on sundays, putting up a Reflection Sundays post. My mother always used to say to me “Ha o ka ithuta ho mamela, o tla ithuta something”. Loosely translated- “If you could teach yourself to listen, you might learn something”. Never did I really learn the value of those words, until I grew older.
Even with the encounters I’ve had with many people,, I’ve learned that listening is definitely a HARD skill to master, and once you have it down, its one of the best qualities you can own in your arsenal. When you speak, you’re not really listening, in turn, meaning you’re not really LEARNING.
I’ve thought out 4 Principles of Listening that we could all use in our daily lives and I thought I could share them with you.
4 Principles of Listening
This one for me, is the first and most basic one that one can learn. In order to listen, you have to stop talking. Close your mouth and still your tongue. Let the other person speak. Do not interject, do not talk over someone. Stop. Listen, and let them finish.
MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT, HELP EASE THE PERSON TALKING, INTO TALKING FREELY WITH YOU.
This is important. It takes a lot to talk, and for someone to feel comfortable when talking to you. So more importantly, if in a business setting, maintain eye contact with the person talking to you, nod here and there, to make them feel at ease, to feel like you may understand them (even if you don’t, but leave that query til the end). Don’t stare continuously, at times, look away, so as to allow the person speaking to breath deeply, and relax a little more.
TAKE NOTICE ON THE NON VERBAL COMMUNICATION “BODY LANGUAGE”
Very important. Non Verbal communication is basically another form of listening. Watching how someone is acting when speaking to you, can give you a good indication if they are comfortable, nervous, FREAKING OUT, whether they are confident, afraid, unsure. Non- Verbal communication assists a lot, because judging from the signals given, you can then act in a way to make the speaker feel comforable if they aren’t for instance.
STAY AWAY FROM PREJUDICE AND JUDGING
Try to be as impartial as you can when someone is speaking to you. You may slightly be annoyed at the monotony of the speakers voice, or their hand gestures, but TRY not to get irritated by it. Concentrate on what is being SAID, not what is being done.
People who listen better, are often more receptive, and often are more knowledgable then those who constantly talk, talk and talk. When you listen more, you are drawn to learning a lot more. When you speak less, you give yourself the opportunity to learn more. Do not deny yourself knowledge, everyone deserves it.
Listen to others.
Listen to the sights and sounds around you.
Listen to your body, listen to your mind
It’s a powerful skill.
Listen to yourself. You owe yourself that much.
Be kind to yourself.
Until the next one,
Live in Light and Love ❤